Wednesday, August 26, 2015

Small Town Brewery - Not Your Father's Root Beer

Not root beer, but is it BEER?
I've been hearing a lot about Small Town Brewery's Not Your Father's Root Beer. Some people have been telling me that it's awesome and that I MUST try it. Others have described it as putrid, heinous swill. I really had no intention of ever trying it because I loath gimmicks. LOATH them. Also, there was no way in h-e-double toothpicks I was going to plunk down more than ten bucks for a six pack of something that I would end up pouring down the drain.


Trader Joe's sells singles of just about every beer on their shelf. Thus, I was able to buy a solo 12 ouncer for a buck fiddy. Even I can afford that.

First, I did a little online research about Small Town Brewery. It seems their provenance as a "craft brewery" is a bit...sketchy. Hey, who knows about anything you read on the interwebs? You can't believe anything nowadays. (This is the please don't sue me disclaimer.) However, I read one article that linked Small Town Brewery's primary investor to the company responsible for Four Loko. Remember that stuff? The alleged psychosis-inducing, high ABV, caffeinated concoction that was banned in a number of states? Somehow, I don't find that very hard to believe. Just sayin'.

Not Your Father's Root Beer is clearly just an alcohol fortified soda pop. The one I tried came in at 5.9%. Apparently, there are also HIGHER ABV versions of the stuff. Yikes!

I'm not going to give this stuff a serious review. Come on! I must say, it tasted pretty good. It was like A&W with an alcohol rasp at the end. I can't imagine what the higher ABV versions taste like. Same root beer taste, but way more...burning.

At least this stuff is being marketed toward the higher-end craft beer consumer and not stacked up in 24 ounce cans in the 7-11 cold case. There appears to be a level of responsible salesmanship involved, I'll give them that. I doubt you'll see too many kids (illegally) buying this brew at it's present price point.

I do have to warn you all that although it went down easy and tasted a-okay, the stuff gave me one mother of a headache! I get the same kind of temple throbbing pain whenever I drink wine, too, so take this caveat for what it is. Your experience may differ.

I would never buy this stuff again. Why not just dump a couple of shots of Everclear into some root beer? Personally, I like 100 proof Southern Comfort in root beer...doesn't give me a headache. In any case, lots of folks like Not Your Father's Root Beer, so what the hell do I know? I'm giving it the coveted Golden Turd Award. A brew so bad, it's good!

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